Most MEN BLOW the FIRST DATE: why you are your own worst enemy

Can't help at laughing jajajaj, this is exactly what happened to me last time I tried. I approached her thinking "yeah man go for it, their are attracted to compelling lifestyles, show her what a nice guy you are and the nice life you're having". At the end of the night nothing really happened (it was in a party with many other people) but I actually felt like I had played my cards well and she might be interested so I asked a friend of mine to pass me her number. He first asked her if she was ok with that, to what she responded (in actual capital letters):

- FORGET ABOUT IT
- DON'T FUCKING PASS HIM MY NUMBER

Next time I'll make it much simpler and I'll just be around with my buddies. Women can feel free to approach any time they want though they'll never. Up to you if you're never gonna make a move and then just complain about everything.

This. Guy. Is. My Brother!

As a woman, I don’t wanna be the one carrying the conversation and I want guys to answer questions too. I prefer a balanced conversation.

At 7:52. Listening is one skill women like in a man. They want to be heard and understood. So just let her do most of the talking on the first date.

At 4:30. Men who brag to women about their status, power, and money is a turn off in many other countries. For example in many European countries bragging about yourself is a social taboo. People don't care about your job, income, house, car, and social status the way American women do.

Is there a video about escalating first dates? I can get women to talk, I can make them feel things or blush only with eye contact, but I find it hard to get the proper timing to escalate physically

I was randomly asked on a date on Facebook Chat by a girl who lived in my village for some time back in 2010, when I had gone shopping at her workplace a few times and had a bit of a flirty tension with her when we spoke to each other
(a bunch of prolonged eye contact moments and awkwardly delighted smiles, and things like that),
and it seemed as if she somehow trusted me a lot right from the beginning;
she actively suggested a picnic by a lake some distance away from the village, which even resulted in kissing, and then she invited me home to her a few days later.
I don't know how she was able to trust me that quickly, but I guess she had asked her coworkers about me - I live in a really small village, so people here kinda know which citizens who are trustworthy and have a good reputation - and I am considered friendly and mild-mannered, so that was probably part of it as well.

This works on men too to a lesser degree. Seeing a woman’s TikTok can actually give men the ick same way too much information would give a woman

Interesting take

Funny and insightful. And yet, we have to flirt enough to let the woman know we find them attractive and desirable so that we don't end up in the friendzone.

I am so blessed to have access to your wisdom Doc, I love you!

Unless you are a Chad, then you don't even NEED to take her out on a date.

All this sounds like completely logical but I just can't think about any realistic possible scenario where I'm dating a woman who I barely know, and more than the same for her. Dating a stranger who most knowledge you have about consists just in your fantasies I think is a very unfounded fact.

If MOST men are doing something wrong, then maybe the problem isn't fucking men, it's the women for having standards that are too high.

Passed the test with letting her talk mostly but failed read her interest queue. Need to read her interest sign, like fluffing her and putting in chapstick. I overthink and failed to make a move and things got awkward fast. Just make a move and see how she react and then proceed from there. Don’t make a move, you are in the friend zone fast. If she pull back after a move, don’t freak out. Just move forward and stay focus making the experience fun and safe for her.

Having her talk is good, but you should also have a story or two ready about yourself in my opinion. Not something that's overly bragging, but it should highlight some qualities of personality and character and involve some kind of adventure ideally. Also, I think it's good to have a joke ready that's somewhat politically incorrect or edgy. Something funny that most guys wouldn't dare to say on a first date in fear of making the wrong impression. This is great for breaking the ice, giving her a real laugh, and showing her that you're not afraid to unapologetically be yourself. A bit of polatization helps you attract more of what you want and disqualify the girls that were never a good fit anyway. But this takes more practice and skill than just sitting back and asking questions.

It's like the equivalent of your friend telling you about how great a restaurant is you have never been to. When you actually go to that restaurant and the food is good and the vibe matches your perception from what your friend told you, it's a match and you go back to eat there again. If it's not what you expected, you don't go back. Women are basically thinking the same way when you go on a date

So you watched Corey Wayne videos & are repeating exactly what he said 😂😂😂

It stems from a low value frame in which you're trying to sell yourself instead a high value frame in which you're screening a candidate. Also, when you ask questions and add observations, focus on the emotional side of her story, that will make her relate you with feeling emotions...

Thanks!

Went on my first “date” yesterday, it was my first time ever taking a girl out for dinner so I was very nervous. I’ve already met her a couple times before then, but I’m surprised she even said yes since there’s a decent age gap. She said she enjoyed it but honestly I don’t even know if it went well or not for me , I just been feeling empty,sad, and a bit of regret since I feel like I could’ve done better.But did go how you suggested it should go she talked way more than me I just feel like I could’ve talked a bit more, hope that’s not a bad thing, I was so nervous I forgot to ask or bring up a lot of the things I wanted to talk about 😅 but she also didn’t give me that much of a chance to bring it up anyways . I can’t stop thinking about it since I really do like this girl A lot but I feel like she might deserve better and is really focused on her career,she’s a couple years older than me so she’s had way more experience in this world or maybe I just feel like I’m too young for her. Also now that I got to know her better yesterday shes not really what I expected either, way more outgoing and a really busy person and honestly I’ve just been lonely all my life and don’t really go out that much and I’m sure she realized that too yesterday. I asked her on a second date but she still hasn’t replied, I hope I won’t be as nervous this time and maybe taker her to a place more fun/active. That’s if she even agrees to go out again, but I also don’t wanna get in the way of her career and plans so I’m not sure if I should even keep this up either. :/

Women blow the date too. They're either attracted to you or not

How do you know if it’s a date or not?

you wanna get her phone number and have conversations before the first date. Get her comfortable with you during those conversations that way when you get to the date, it's strictly about enjoying each other's time and company.

Can we get some prompts please?

oh god, I have lost SO MANY times 😢

To me this is all common sense. Which hopefully means I’m ahead of most guys.

This is why in Europe, when we go on a 'first date' we already know each other quite a bit via work, friends, relations etc. This walking up to people on the street, because you think they're cute, asking for their number like they do in the US, seems crazy. It's basically a blind date afterwards, what are the odds of compatibility..

Bro your making me nervous

So most guys are struggling to get laid. That matters A LOT. There’s basic conversational skills being even keel and yes ask questions. But short term dating can get old once you’ve gotten paid enough. Move toward finding someone who will receive your seduction and listening but also listen and support you. Even if you have multiple women like this it’s about retaining great connections.

i dont think its that hard to go on a date...men dont wanna go on dates.women almost always want to

Thank you Orion.

Dating tips for Men are somehow always rooted in humiliation .

On our first date, I got my ex-wife to do most of the talking. After we got married, she still did all the talking.

If I was on a first date and my goal was finding a romantic partner, it seems to me the goal would be to see if we enjoy talking together in normal conversation, and if we have similar values and life style preferences. So I would want to just follow normal rules of good conversation, and as part of it talk about myself and ask her about herself.